Ignoranamus Maximus

This original posting can be found at Words of My Life by Kevin Numerick:

 

I very much dislike racists. Bigots. Anything of the sort. One of my good friends had something happen that deals with rude, ignorant foolish people of this type. It really pisses me off. Some prick ass schmuck worker of some company kept coming up with lies that were easily disproved by simply having someone else request the same service and get a different answer.

I cannot tell you how much this makes my skin crawl with irritation. It's 2008 people, it's more than time to get over this type of garbage. I know you likely agree if you are reading this blog.

Now, don't get me wrong, I know in some things I am rather naive, especially when it comes to different cultures, but I sure do not sit here and judge others for it. In fact, in my short time here, knowing some of the people I do, I have taken time and indulged myself into some of the other cultures within our great country. I found out just how much I didn't know. A lot. There's still plenty to know, plenty for me to learn, that is why I just don't get this crap.

When I was in college in New Mexico I joined the Black Student Union. Yeah, that's right, I sure did and it was one of the best things I ever did. I got some quarky looks sometimes, being the white boy in the black student union, but I just tried to use that to get others to listen and say, oh hey, I should check this out too. I even remember sometimes when handing out flyers the responses I would get were just silly. "No thanks, I'm not black."   Well no shit…am I? Nope, it was about having the chance to gain knowledge about something I didn't know.  Apparently they didn't look at it like that.

In the end though, we, myself and the rest of the group, took that school organization that was crumbling and made it the most successful one on campus with the highest number of people involved. It was an awesome experience. We did all sorts of stuff. Some of which has become an annual event for the college now. I'd say that is some success.

I also joined the Hispanic Student Association. This wasn't quite as large, but there were a lot of great people involved with this group as well. I really learned a lot of differences between the cultures, and being from norther Michigan where almost everyone is white, it was amazing to me. I told you, I was/am naive, but I really like learning about all of this stuff. The most important things I learned though, were the similarities.
I also spent quite a bit of time learning about the older cultures of New Mexico. The Native American tribes and history of that state are incredible. I walked through cliff dwellings, listened to the stories of some elders, walked through museums and saw artifacts, art, and the horrors that the Spaniards brought with them when they first came to this country. It was all a bit overwhelming sometimes.

In the end, I learned that we are all in search of the same thing. Happiness. Even with our differences, we are in search for a common goal. And that brings us back to these idiots. I just don't get it. I don't. We're all here, we're all people, we're all uniquely joined together through this world, this country, and bring to each other new growth and knowledge, and we all are striving to make it in life, to be happy, why must some spit on others as if they do not have that same right to dream, to live, to love, to be happy. It's just not right. It's not acceptable.

You're not black, brown, purple, yellow, red, green, or any other color. You're my neighbor. My friend. My lover. My child, my brother. That's all I see. Maybe someday everyone will see people like that.

 

 

Marks On This World

The Day We're Born We Start To Die:  It's what you do in between your begining and your end that others will remember.  There are some people who are born to greatness, it's something automatic about them that without their ever realizing it, their path is predtermined.  Fated.  Destined.  There are others who also have paths laid out for them, but they live lives of mediocracy or in worn and tattered clothes getting their meals from a soup kitchen.  Some fall into good things by chance, others work very hard reaching for the American Dream.

 

It doesn't matter who you are or what your station in life is, no matter what we think, we all leave our mark.  We all have things about us worth remembering.  We've all touched at least one someone and changed their life in some way.  I guess what I am trying to put across is that you don't have to be super rich, a doctor, actor or politician to leave a mark of yourself on this world.  You may view yourself as just the average everyday sort and still be a powefull force in someone else's life, without ever realizing it.  It can be something you've said or a deed you've done that so alters someones perception about who they are and inspires them to improve upon themselves to a degree that they in turn leave their mark on someone else as being that other person's inspiration.  You alone can set in motion a chain of events all the while thinking you're no one special!

 

I am just an average person, but I know the marks I'll be leaving when my time to part company comes.  My children. They are my greatest accomplishments, a gift I was given and bequeath to the world.  They can, and I bet they will leave their mark on a multitude of others.  They've already left their marks on me just by existing. 

 

Another mark of mine, I share with my husband and that is what love should be.  I want my kids to not view it as what my first marriage was, but what this marriage is:  friendship; love; trust.  It's not something we 'work' at, it just is.  Easy and uncomplicated.

 

Maybe I have, or maybe I haven't left my mark on others but I'd like to think I have in some small way.  Others have left their mark on me by way of helping me when I wouldn't even admit to myself that I needed it; inspiring me in some way; or just being there in friendship.  Even the bad marks can help you if you let them, and I've had a few of those as well.

 

So, although I'm just a regular person living a regular life, I will be remembered.  Not by the world at large and I am more than fine with that, but by those that mean the most to me and hopefully a few I've touched along the way.

 

Bette

Case Of Stress

This past week has been one rife with stress for me, and I freely admit that I have indeed let it get to me.  I've had stress about this for a very long time now, and it's finally caught up with me:

 

My husband, my middle child, and myself have been dealing with some home repair issues that the homeowner contracted with someone, to complete in a timely manner.  However it's been almost a year since that contract was made and we are still dealing with it.

 

A number of things were to have been done, and I can say that some have been completed but those were minor ones for this particular contractor to acheive:  the new front porch posts and safety railing for the side porch (where none had ever existed, in violation of course) were installed.  Of the laundry list of things that were ordered, those two things are done -- however the one porch post does move in in extreme wind, so I guess you could say it wasn't done entirely.

 

A basement screen door was paid for in advance by the homeowner the first of August last year.  It was not installed until DECEMBER, and then when the contractor was fired this past January he came and took it.  I called the police, the home owner and the management company.  The contractor claims he received notification of defect from the manufacturer which is why he removed it, but for some reason no one was ever told of this -- he just came and took it one day while the house was empty.  He returned what he claims is a new door two weeks later but only because he was caught.

 

The exterior of the house was painted, last August I believe.  The contractor brought one man to do the job and the contractor left.  There was to be one coat of primer and two coats of paint applied.  Now, as I was home alone with my daughter I kept a close eye on this man I'd never seen before.  When someone goes around the house a total of one time, there is no way in hell what the homeowner paid for was done.  Within a month, the paint looked a old already.

 

On the back side of October last year I had to move all items from the dining area and hall way as the old flooring was to be pulled up.  My living room was a complete and utter distaster from our having to make room for several items.  I dismanteled my table and put it along with all the chairs and a cabinet in the basement until the time came that I could put them back in their rightful place.  The old flooring was pulled up and the contractor and his helper left after explaining he'd have to come back to lay underlayment and let it cure for a day before he could install the new flooring.  Two weeks before Christmas they returned to lay the underlayment!  Finally, on December 22nd, 2007 I had a new floor installed from side door all the way down the hallway.  The floor is ugly; is a soft vinyl type and is not glued down so it moves when I saddle up my portable dishwasher.  Nice.  Because he did not tear up the kitchen portion of the old flooring, there is a ridge in between the kitchen and dining area which cannot be repaired unless the whole thing is pulled back up and installed properly.  Just this past Saturday the trim work was finally installed!!!  Can you at all understand my stress here on this?  He was also to patch some ceiling cracks, which he did in part but claims to have put two coats on and needs to apply a third -- you cannot apply a third coat of anything on top of one, can you?  Right now it looks like it did before he even put that one coat on.

 

He was to repair some water damage in the bathroom floor near the head of the bathtub.  All he did was remove some old caulking and apply new.  The floor was spongy in that area when we moved in, and you guessed it, it still is.  My understanding of repairing something is fixing it to a condition where the problem no longer exists.  But, that could just be me.

 

Here is where I must insert what a great job the roofing contractor did!  This is no lie:  when I'd sit where I always do on the sofa and it's raining outside, it would quite literally rain on me from the ceiling!  The roofing contractor came when no one was home and tore up the bad roof to install a new one.  The clean up job was so perfect, our neighbors had to tell us the job was done that day.  Now, that is professionalism.

 

I remark about the roof repair because below that roof was the living room bow window that leaked water during the rain and freezing air in the cold.  The day of that 'professional' paint job, I was informed the new Anderson Bow window replacement would be installed at the begining of Septemeber.  I was absolutely overjoyed to be having a window I could see out of (the old one was so severly weather-worn nothing I did to clean it worked).  So September comes and goes, as does October and November.  The contractor claims issues with the window manufacturer so we continue to wait.  He promises, in an email to the home owner that the window will be installed before the end of the year.  You got it, the end of the year came and went and we continued to have to jack the thermostat to full volume in order to be what one could call comfortable.  I received an email close to New Years Eve that the window had arrived!  However, by mid January I still had not been contacted to install it.  Close to the end of January, the home owner fired the contrator.  I honestly felt relieved that I would not have to deal with him any longer.  But....

 

I came home from work one day in late February to find that there was a window standing in front of my garage door.  I took pictures of it and the labeling.  No, I have to report here that it was not a new Anderson Bow window nor was it purchased through a window manufacturer.  It is a picture window with casements on either end ordered through Home Depot on December 12th, 2007.  I sent the photo's to the home owner.  A note was left for me to contact him (the contractor) to install the window.  So, after hearing from the home owner to go ahead and use that window, I called the contractor and left a message.  Two weeks later I get a voice mail indicating he just then got my message, he was on holiday the entire time.  Now, I have to ask:  What reputable contractor leaves product out in the open and then goes on holiday?  Last Saturday he comes over to install the new window.  He removes the old one and places it on my front yard.  As more water damage is found, he places a phone call to the home owner giving her two options on what can be done to remedy the situation.  Twenty minutes later, after not having heard back from the home owner, he decided to insert the new window temporarily.  So, he and his helper do just that.  No seal against the cold air or against the expected rain we were to get during the week.  They use our personal trash cans for the debris from the removal of the old window, do not removed the old window from the front yard, and leave.  I inform the home owner of all of this, and as I receieve an email from their daughter I learn her folks are on holiday and she is taking control of the situation.  And boy did she!  She let this contractor know what the thought about his using our property for debris and leaving the old window on the front yard -- a safety concern.  That any contractor should remove all debris from the property at the end of each day.  She questioned his integrity and work ethic.  She has demanded photographs of the new Anderson Bow window he temporarliy installed which they paid for last year, plus all warranty and invoice documentation for all products as well as the supposed letter of defect regarding the basement screen door.  She won't get them.  She also demanded, and got him to remove all debris before I got home that day (last week Wednesday).

 

The contractor was supposed to be over again last week Thursday to patch the ceiling cracks, and based on the emails she had previously sent to him, I was a nervous wreck at having to see him.  What if he was to take his anger at her out on me?  I was directed by the home owner to call the police if it got out of hand.  Well, fortunately the contractor emailed me that he couldn't make it Thursday and would Friday be okay to which I said 'sure'.  I was finally able to relax for the first time that day and it was already 4:39 pm.  So Friday comes and more emails are sent from the home owner to the contractor after she had a chat with the property management company.  He was to call and make arrangements via them to me all along, and he never did -- not once.  He was to call them before coming to the house that day or he would be asked to leave, and I could call the police on him for tresspass.  When I got home from work, I called the property management company to inquire if the contractor did indeed get their approval to come over, as I had not received any notification from them that he had.  He did not call them and I was to ask him to leave if he did show up; to call the police if he refused.  Relief again when he didn't arrive. 

 

I am still in a state of stress,though.  I have a temporarily installed window that is too big to be installed properly by anyone unless the opening is made larger.  I have very cold air coming in worse than before because even though the seal wasn't the best in the old window, at least it was something.  Now there is no seal. so you can imagine the amount of cold air that comes in now.  Fortunately, there was no water infiltration during the rain we got as I have no way to put up any kind of barrier on the exterior.  More stress comes from the fact that this person may come back and remove this window while we're not home, or even worse when my daughter is home alone.  She has been instructed to call the police if he does show up, though.

 

Becuse my husband had a stroke last September, I do all I can to keep him stress free so a potential second stroke, or worse, happens.  There is only so much I can do since he lives this affair right along with me.  I worry for my own health because of this.  I've noticed things about myself that didn't happen before this, but am hopeful that it can now subside knowing I do not have to deal with this contractor in the future.  I won't.  I've informed the property manager that I am fearful of him and just cannot have him here again.  The biggest reason is for the health of my husband:  if anyone were to get nasty with me, he would want to protect me which could be harmful to him. 

 

Please, wish me luck in the resolution of all of this stress.  I can't carry it to the extent that I do alone anymore.  I tried, for many many months, and I'm tired.  Very tired.

 

Bette